To be frank, it took a while
for me to be the Bigger person,
to acknowledge that the
part I played in our destruction
may have been small,
but that maybe it ate at you,
chip by chip.
And for a time, I just got so
tired of picking up the pieces
of our brokenness and
sweeping them under the
rug of my shame—
my shame of never having
to keep things whole, to
see every love story
play out to its worst ending.
But once I allowed myself to be happy
that you had found the person
who steadied your intrepid heart,
I realized that I could rest easier at night,
knowing one less broken-hearted soul
and hoping that when I finally get it right,
it will have all been worth it.
I want to seem to have things figured out
so that it’s easy for you to run to me
And before you even see my tears,
they’ve all dried out
so that I can offer you a sunny day
Even though I’m not as put together
as I’m perceived to be,
you’ll never have to face
that side of me.
Someday, when you’re okay
I’ll tell you my story.
Not because I want your pity,
but because everyone goes through
We have our own cross to carry.
When you say,
“Let’s wipe the slate clean,”
does that mean
we throw everything away?
we made a mess.
But it was a fabulous riot
of proportions hard to forget.
So do we just let
all those go?
I say No.
No to keeping things all
neat and clean
and in boxes.
Every day, I uncover more of you.
As I go through your mess
and you go through mine,
I find more and more things
to love about us.
Yes to this ruckus.
We are standing on the precipice
of something truly spectacular.
The compelling anticipation is
almost too much to bear.
And eyes have seen and lips have spoken
a future both bright and quite fragile
So I must wait with steadfast faith,
with deliberate care.
I picture your face as I draw breaths,
willing patience as you to come to the
inevitable conclusion of which
I am fully aware.
We are a union made to exceed
the vastness of all universes.
Take my hands, hold my heart, dear
Let me take you there.
Do not dwell on your despair, my heart
Let not the scars
of battles lost
impede you from beating.
Let not the nightmares
that haunt your sleep
stop you from dreaming.
Let not the cuts
of promises broken
obstruct you from hoping.
One day, my heart,
you will find the one
worthy of your collection of
scars and dreams and cuts.
And while this seems farthest from what’s true
One day, you will feel like new.
Let your face be the first thing I see
In mornings, bright and sunny,
Let it remind me of easy days
Beneath thunderstorms and dreary skies
Let me stare into your eyes
And find in them a steady bay
Where I can stay.
Amidst the grueling work week rush
As I toil and grind and mush
I will trust that I find my way
To your arms each day.
And as the sun surrenders to the moon
And darkness begins to loom
Let your kisses sweep me far away
In your arms, I end this day.
You know that feeling—
When you witness the soft light of the sun’s first rays,
Or the glorious pearl luminescence of the full moon
And it’s baiting you to take
That perfect Instagrammable shot
But you don’t take it…
You’re not even tempted.
Because there’s someone beside you
Who takes your full attention
And he’s the only one you want to
Share that moment with…