I say I still love you
And you say you still love me.
But we are always lying.
Sometimes it’s me
And sometimes it’s you
But we both pretend we believe
so that we don’t hurt each other.
Someday our lies
Will catch up to us
And then who will we lie to?
We are a tumble of breaths,
Each not knowing where one starts and one ends.
with your every inhale, my ribs are pulled in,
And in my every exhale it is your breath I smell on me,
We are so close, we share the same air.
I’ve dry-cleaned the gown that I’ll wear in that surprise party you said you’d throw me one day.
And I’ve packed my suitcase just in case we finally make it to that trip you’ve promised.
I’ve brought my boots out if you ever think of going on that hike.
Our list is getting longer, but not my patience.
I’m so ready for you to be ready.
You didn’t read how our story ends
Even though it was your hand that wrote it.
Maybe you pictured yourself a hero
and I didn’t need saving.
Maybe you saw yourself kind
and I didn’t need kindness either.
But someday, when you figure out
how to love in earnest,
You’ll open up our book and read til the very end
And know that I never said it was all your fault.
The trouble with me is that I trouble with you.
Who knew of the trouble the two of us could brew?
I didn’t have a clue of what trouble could ensue
when I add a bit of me and you add a bit of you
Oh the tangles I undo when its trouble I pursue.
Someday you’ll realize who pours the coffee when you yawn;
Or who always has a dry sleeve for you to cry on.
Who opens the door when you need a place to crash in;
Who cheers the loudest when you stand up to sing.
In time you will know this poem was for you;
And also this shirt, because I know you love blue.
But until them I am in this precarious state
I hold my heart by a string, awaiting its fate.
I deserve more than your kindness, but kindness will suffice.
When you do figure out where I stand, please be nice.
I used to fill my days to the brim
Never giving a moment’s pause,
Ignoring your gentle tugging;
Your antics, always trying to
steer my attention; stealing what
Limited time I have to climb that
golden ladder with no end in sight.
Don’t you understand how precious
my time is and how
the softness of your lips;
Your warm breath on my ear;
Even your delicious sweat
Are all unwelcome distractions?
But now, how odd that what I thought
I didn’t have enough of, I have in such abundance;
Now I spend days hugging unwashed sheets;
Inhaling the scent from the clothes you left behind;
Remembering the words you breathed in my ear.
What will I do now with all this time?
There’s a road you want to cross
A ride you want to take
I offer you my hand
And all the dreams I make.
I know you have a list
Of things you want to see…
I don’t have all the answers
But you can have all of me.
I ask where’d you want to be
How high you’d want to fly?
I’m not here to hold you down
Let’s give this love a try.
And if you feel at times
The end is out of sight
I’ll be here to pull you through
I won’t go without a fight
Because I see in you
Much more that what you see
Someday you’ll know it too
Just put your faith in me.
Make Room for Poetry 