It was the same road,
But a different direction.
It was the same words,
But a different intention.
When I look back
I find myself in contention
If all that ever was
my mind’s own creation.
There’s a road you want to cross
A ride you want to take
I offer you my hand
And all the dreams I make.
I know you have a list
Of things you want to see…
I don’t have all the answers
But you can have all of me.
I ask where’d you want to be
How high you’d want to fly?
I’m not here to hold you down
Let’s give this love a try.
And if you feel at times
The end is out of sight
I’ll be here to pull you through
I won’t go without a fight
Because I see in you
Much more that what you see
Someday you’ll know it too
Just put your faith in me.
This is a tale
of a half that wasn’t
missing
and a whole that wasn’t
searching.
Happy it was, humming
the song that was in its head.
It lived its life not
in wanting;
And its days not spent
in waiting.
But once the half
came along,
the whole found
its old song
with new combinations,
exciting variations
of which it never sounded so.
Every note was the same,
but it leapt with a vigor
From where it didn’t know.
Apart they were good,
But together they were better.
A choice was then made
to be together forever.
To be frank, it took a while
for me to be the Bigger person,
to acknowledge that the
part I played in our destruction
may have been small,
but that maybe it ate at you,
chip by chip.
And for a time, I just got so
tired of picking up the pieces
of our brokenness and
sweeping them under the
rug of my shame—
my shame of never having
to keep things whole, to
see every love story
play out to its worst ending.
But once I allowed myself to be happy
that you had found the person
who steadied your intrepid heart,
I realized that I could rest easier at night,
knowing one less broken-hearted soul
and hoping that when I finally get it right,
it will have all been worth it.
I want to seem to have things figured out
so that it’s easy for you to run to me
without hesitation.
And before you even see my tears,
they’ve all dried out
so that I can offer you a sunny day
with conviction.
Even though I’m not as put together
as I’m perceived to be,
you’ll never have to face
that side of me.
Someday, when you’re okay
I’ll tell you my story.
Not because I want your pity,
but because everyone goes through
something.
We have our own cross to carry.
Why do you feel the need to discredit me
To make our parting sound as though you had expected it from the start?
I came into this relationship with just as much fervor as you did.
Believe it or not, I had the highest hopes that ours would be the one to beat;
That ours would be the standard all our friends would be holding a candle to.
But now that I’ve finally accepted that it’s not working out for either of us,
I have to be the villain?
While I’ve realized it’s nothing that you did,
I also recognize that it’s nothing I did or didn’t do that caused the collapse.
It simply didn’t work out.
The fact that I struck the final blow that led to the demise of us didn’t make it any less painful for me,
Didn’t give me the satisfaction that you imagined I got.
But go ahead and assail my person if it’s your way of making sense of what had happened.
I’m just happy I didn’t waste more of our time.
